Chronicles Of My Ana: Almost Halja

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Almost Halja

I made a new blog entirely. After a month(10/28), I will delete this blog.
The new URL is AlmostHalja.blogspot.com
Please and thank you. :)

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Stats

*The Basics*
1.Name:: Halja
2.Sex:: female
3.Birthday:: 4 February 1997
4.Age:: 14
5.Location:: Rifle
6.Hair Color:: Blonde
7.Eye Color:: turns color from grey-blue-green
*My Eating Disorder*
8.What Eating Disorders Do You Have:: Anorexia.
9.How Long Have You Had Them:: since June 2010
10.Why Do You Have An Eating Disorder:: I don't really know...
11.Are You Proud or Ashamed of Your Eating Disorder:: Ashamed. Very ashamed. And I should be. The girls at school think I'm positively beautiful. They thinks this disease is beautiful. This disease is going to kill me.
12.Do People Know About Your Eating Disorder:: My friends. And pretty much everyone at school.
13.Do You Wish People Knew About it:: No.
14.Do You Wish You Never Had An Eating Disorder:: Yup.
15.Do You Think The Media is Partially Responsible For Your Eating Disorder:: No.
*My Body*
16.Weight Before Eating Disorder:: 118 lbs.
17.Height: 5'5.25’’
18.Current Weight:: Around 100
19.Highest Weight:: 124
20.Lowest Weight:: I DUNNO :C
21.Are You Tired A lot:: Yes.
22.Have You Ever Fainted:: Yes.
23.Are You Cold All The Time:: Yes.
24.Do Your Ribs Show:: Yes.
25.Do Your Hipbones Show:: Yes.
26.Does Your Collar Bone Show:: Yes.
27.Can You See Your Ribs Through Your Back:: Yes.
28.Do Your Thighs Touch:: No.
29.Chest Size:: 36A
30.Does Your Head Look Too Big For Your Body:: Not really.
31.Are You Satisfied With The Way You Look Now:: No.
32.If You Could, What Would You Change About Yourself:: I wish I wasn't anorexic.
34.What Is Your B.M.I.:: 16.something
35.What Do The Doctors Say is Your Ideal Weight:: They don't know.
36.What Do You Think Is Your Ideal Weight:: 90
*My Thinspirations*
37.Who Are Your Thinspirations:: Nope.

38.Who is Your Favorite Thinspiration:: LOLNOTTELLING
39.Who is Your Second Favorite Thinspiration:: (not telling)
40.Why Do You Envy Them:: So beautiful....
41.What's The Best Thing About Them:: (not telling)
42.What's The Worst Thing About Them::(Not telling)
43.Would You Trade Places With Them If You Could:: Life is a mysterious thing.
*My Mind*
44.Do You Consider Your Eating Disorder a 'Disorder':: Yes.
45.Are You Pro-Ana/Pro-Mia:: ANOREXIA and BULIMIA are DISEASES that should not be called by petsy nicknames and should not be WORSHIPED.
46.Would You Ever Want Your Best Friend To Have An Eating Disorder:: No. Never.
47.What Are Your Disordered Eating Habits:: I just...don't eat at this point.
48.Are You Obsessive Compulsive:: Yes.
49.Are You A Perfectionist:: Yes.
50.Do You Have Depression:: Yes.
51.Are You A Cutter:: Yes.
52.Have You Ever Been Suicidal:: Yes.
53.Have You Ever Attempted Suicide:: Yes.
54.Have You Ever Been Hospitalized For Mental Reasons:: Yes.
55.Have You Ever Been Hospitalized For Your Eating Disorder:: No.
56.Do You Have Body Dismorphic Disorder:: No.
*Your Life Outside Your Disorder*
57.Favorite Color:: Black, yellow, white, blue.
58.Favorite Movie:: Underworld
59.Favorite Book:: Harry Potter
60.Favorite T.V. Show:: Spongebob
61.Favorite Season:: Winter.
62.Favorite Day of The Week:: Saturday.
63.Favorite Time Of Day::. When the weather lines up just right with the breeze and creates a bit of a fairytale scenery.
64.Favorite Holiday:: Christmas
65.Favorite Hobby:: Fish keeping. I have 2 aquariums.
66.Favorite Actor:: Alan Rickman
67.Favorite Actress:: Kate Beckinsale
68.Favorite Musician:: Nils Andersson. <3
69.Do You Have Any Pets:: 2 cats, 2 dogs, 6 fish.
70.What Do You Like To Do In Your Spare Time:: Read, watch my fish.
*The Future*
71.What Do You Want To Study In College:: Midwifery
72.What Career Do You Want:: Midwife.
73.Do You Ever Want To Get Married:: Yes.
74.Do You Ever Want Kids:: Yes.
75.Where Do You Want To Live:: Horby, Sweden.
76.Will You Have Any Pets:: Probably just fish. I'd be too busy to nourish a cat or dog.
77.What Type of House Do You Want:: A big one. With a pool.
78.What Goals Do You Have That Are Unrelated To Your Eating Disorder:: To be successful, and happy.
79.What's Your Number One Priority:: Making my dad proud. :3
80.How Do You Think You Will Die:: Anorexia, or my health problems.
81.When Do You Think You WIll Die:: Young. I'm not very healthy, even with out anorexia.
82.Will You Be Missed By Anyone:: Yes.

83.Will You Have Any Regrets:: Always.
84.Will You Have Any Unfinished Business:: Always.
85.Will Your eating disorder still be affecting you:: Always.
I AM -
[x] anorexic
[ ] ednos
[ ] bulimic
[ ] living off diet pills
[x] hungry
[x] thirsty
[ ] drinking something
[ ] eating something
[x] under 100lbs
[x] starving myself
[ ] participating in a fast
[ ] vegan
PEOPLE -
[x] ask if I’m anorexic/bulimic
[ ] call me fat
[x] say I’m skinny
[ ] say I’m ugly
[x] say I’m pretty
[x] spread rumors about me
[ ] force me to eat
[ ] say I eat too much
[x] wish I’d eat more
[ ] don't know I'm anorexic/bulimic
[x] have tried to stop me
I WISH -
[ ] I was thin
[x] I had a better body(AN-healthier)
[x] I didn't have to eat
[ ] I could control myself
[ ] I was under 110lbs
[ ] I could avoid food
[ ] I could hide what I am
[ ] I wasn’t fat
[ ] I was prettier
[x] I could stop being ana/mia
[ ] I had a boy/girlfriend
[ ] I could disappear
I LOVE -
[x] feeling hungry
[x] seeing a difference
[ ] shaking
[ ] being weak (but strong at the same time)(AN- wtf is this bullshit question?)
[x] losing weight
[ ] being anorexic/bulimic
[x] green tea
[x] diet pills
[x] being able to turn down food
[x] feeling good about myself
I HATE -
[x] when people stare
[x] being asked questions
[x] having to eat
[ ] being single
[x] wearing short skirts
[ ] being fat
[ ] looking ugly
[x] feeling this way
[ ] fat people
I NEED -
[ ] more support
[x] people to stay out of my business
[ ] more friends
[ ] someone to know
[ ] less food
[x] more water
[ ] a gym membership
[ ] to lose 50 lbs
[ ] to lose 30 lbs
[ ] to lose 15 lbs
[x] to lose 10 lbs
I'm updating this every Saturday